i take quite a few pictures of my kids sleeping. some day they may think i'm the creepy mom, but honestly, i love capturing their ability to zonk out anywhere. one marker that my kids are chill and comfortable and that life is going along okay is if they are sleeping. the peaceful slumber, the arms flung wildly in every direction...i absolutely love it.
think about the reckless abandon with which a toddler sleeps. Ana doesn't wander around the house making sure i've got dinner planned and the laundry done. she doesn't insure that someone will be here when she wakes up. she simply trusts that everything is as it should be and that I (her mama) has everything under control and that i will still be here when she wakes up.
do i really have everything under control? no, but as far as she is concerned, from her perspective i do and that' s what matters to her. how often do i run around like a crazy lady and push myself because i'm afraid that if i rest, if i take a moment off, that these twirling plates of my life will shatter on the floor? all too often.
being a mom has taught me a lot about giving up control. giving up the worry and instead telling Him about my worries. being a single mom is teaching me how to trust in Jesus for my finances, for my food, for work, for energy...for everything. it reminds me that he is not only aware of all the details...but he is intimately orchestrating all the details for my good and His glory.
over the past two weeks, temperatures have risen and i think we can officially say that the snow is gone for good in central, ny. with this came the need for cool, summer clothing. i searched through the girls' drawers and found minimal summer outfits and quietly said, "okay, God, we're going to need some summer stuff and i need you to find it for me...whether it's TJ Maxx, garage sales, hand me downs...whatevs. just let me know when you find it."
i woke on Friday morning and immediately thought about neighborhood garage sales nearby that happen annually. i flipped through my smartphone and found that indeed, they were happening that day. two lunches packed, two kids out the door, two more staying with me--i raced about dressing and grabbing sippies and snacks. we arrived at the sales about a half hour after they started and by golly, the same house i'd been frequenting for the past two years had their wares spread out in their garage. little did they know their second-hand clothes were a direct answer to prayer. one large shopping bag and three smaller ones later my littles and i walked back to our car...provision in hand. new summer and fall wardrobes for both the girls.
yes, He moves mountains. yes, he heals the sick. yes, He parts seas. and He's also in the little details--the summer wardrobes, the toilets that need to be cleaned, the meals that need to be prepared and the friendships that pull us through.
He is in the details.